Live Birth
Light dapples on walls, gray/white ripples in shadows behind her. Classical piano notes sound behind me as I gaze over her brown hair through the windows to the trees outside.
My mind goes back to another sun and shadow scene, she on the floor with her four year old toys, daylight streaming through the glass and warming that rich brown hair.
There are no playtoys in her lap this time,just something she wants to read to me.
“Listen to this, mom.”
She’s 34 now, grown and growing a child of her own. It’s been a troubling time and this growing hasn’t been easy–challenges at every turn as this young one inside her has come into his own.
We’ve walked through worry and fear, concerns driving our prayers, doctors and tests fueling our imaginations,much of it dark.
The light broke as we learned last week their every suspicion was incorrect and that doctors don’t always know everything.
I listen as she reads from inTouch about Joshua and the walls of Jericho, how the people believed God and miracles happened, obeying through their fears simply by shouting, tumbling walls to the earth.
God has smashed through the walls around our lives this season, “not to shame us or break us down, but to make His might all the more apparent.”
She continues, “It’s the reason why the Lord loves to do the impossible. Every time he does, the walls we’ve fabricated to confine him are irrevocably smashed,and He gets the glory that is his due.”
I acknowledge that sometimes God needs to destroy the walls we erect so He can make room for something even bigger.
She declares in her quiet, big-girl voice, “Since we’ve been going through these challenges, mom, everything is different with me. W. and I were going along in our same ol’, same ol’ lives and look what God’s done to bring our families all together through this.
I am not the same.”
And I think of another birth besides this boy within,
that of a new life without form but full of heart,
without skin but great with promise,
a life borne through midwifery of another kind,
that brings spiritual things to life and awakens new freedom in her,
this brown-haired girl who is 34, sitting in a chair by the window in the light.
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